Life, Death, and how to decide.

Lee told me today he hates taking all these pills and he wants to talk to the doctor about stopping some of them.
 I took out each of his pills and told him what each one is for. I also told him that if he does stop the leukemia medication he would probably die within a few months, and as much as I really do love him and want him around I would support his decision.
 We discussed the parkinsons, and he understands that one really is only helping the tremor be not so bad, and he knows its not a cure and it will get worse eventually. He knows that carbidopa/levodopa doesn't even slow the progression of parkinsons, it just makes it easier to live with the symptoms. He may decide to stop it, I won't make that decision for him.
 The Prozac helps with his anger control, supposedly, I know that the dementia is affecting his moods more and more and Prozac isn't likely doing much.
 The rest he's on... Pantaprazole( think that's it) for reflux, vitamin D, Iron(the leukemia causes anemia, his iron was pretty bad) a multivitamin, seroquel(because the iron doesn't play well with sinimet so he can't take that at bedtime he's on the seroquel to knock him out despite the tremors trying to keep him awake), and hydrocodone(he generally only takes one in the morning when he wakes up, that's when the arthritis in his lower back is the worst), but he can take it up to 4 times a day, tamsulosin for an enlarged prostate,i Gleevec for the CML, and Claritin or zyrtec for year round allergies.
 It looks like a lot in his pill box but I know realistically it's not that much.
 I am very realistic in the outcome, I know he will die sooner rather than later. I know his meds aren't cures and his diseases are terminal. He knows that also. I've never kept the truth from him or downplayed the situation at all. He would make the decision knowing the outcome, and I would be ok with whatever decision he makes. We have actually discussed assisted suicide and he knows there is that option(he's catholic so he has said from the start that's not an option). He and I both don't see stopping his meds as suicide, we see it as allowing nature to take its course.
As much as I love my husband I can't fix him. I wish I could wrap my arms around him a
or wave a magic wand and cure him. I can't though, and I am most certainly aware that he is dying and I will lose my knight in shining armor. I will take every minute I am given though, and cherish every bit of it. Of he does decide to stop the medications we will then discuss hospice.
 I have known for many years that my happily ever after won't be forever after.